Fist in the Mouth refers to one of Ember's favorite pasttimes- sticking his fist in his mouth. He just turned 3 months old on the 7th of November and that is quite frankly insane. Since his first days as a confused and sad baby he has tried sticking his little hand in his mouth in hopes even a bit of relief from this strange world.
Sometimes I see it as a metaphor for my own life- my oftentimes pathetic attempt at finding security in a world that has changed dramatically. Like Ember, I struggle and struggle to stop crying. It usually works for a few seconds before the fist flies involuntarily to the side I am left weeping in a set of diapers.
Ember's birth threw me into a world almost as confusing and new as the one he is navigating through right now. I sort of did a freefall into what a lot of people call the American Dream. I am married to an incredible person. We have two beautiful kids. We live in a newly purchased home and I have a job which in general is one I enjoy and provides some financial stability. We've accomplished what society has prescribed for us, which is exactly the opposite of what I thought I'd be doing about 2 1/2 years ago.
My entrance into "normality" leaves me uneasy a lot of times, but really through the thin veneer of a stable job, modest home and button down shirts it doesn't seem too hard to see that we're still the same quixotic people we were before we had kids.
The truly difficult part of life has been how incredibly busy my job and new lifestyle have left me. I can honestly say I have never been so occupied in my entire life. Life as a first year teacher in the Denver Public School District is a rollercoaster. Add into the mix that I am working towards my license and an English Language Acquisition certification and I am left frazzled more days than not. Still, the kids I work with rock and my school is a sort of oasis in the desert of stifling bureaucratic procedures.
So this blog is an attempt to document this quickly changing period of my life. Like most attempts I make at writing about my life it'll probably start strong and fizzle out as my to-do list looms over me. We'll see though. I hope that this can at least be a place to post pictures of the kiddos and share some developmental milestones and funny stories.